What struck me about this was that I didn’t feel sad or depressed about this realization.  What came to mind is that it would be a peaceful way to go and that there is no reason to hang on to the needs and desires lying on my deathbed.  I have them now because I am still trying to find a way of letting go and may never achieve that goal.  The fact that there is a way to let go of them is enough for me right now and I’ll continue working on being less attached and less driven to have or hold onto “things” instead of just enjoying them in the present.

As a geriatric therapist, I tend to work with a lot of people who are, obviously, older in life and dealing with existential issues regarding death as well as the usual therapeutic problems.  Working with this population has, I hope, given me some insight into the meaning, or lack of meaning, in life.  As far as I can tell, we go through life, live it the best we can, hope we don’t cause too much destruction or have too many regrets, and then let go and hope that we have done a good job.

At the end of Simon Boccanegra, the main character dies from poisoning.   Before this happens, Simon is able to be forgiven by his archenemy and to forgive his other enemy.  He also gives his blessings to his daughter and his former enemy to marry in peace. I think he feels that life is short and that people do the best they can and forgiveness is actually the way to salvation and freedom.  What does this mean to me?  I am not a parent so I won’t leave behind any kids to continue my line or my way of being and I’m content with that.  Simply stated, I will die some day and I’ll be remembered by some, forgotten by most and it will be what it is and nothing more than that.  And for that, I am thankful.

So, I decided, after reading Omnivore’s Dilemma and watching Food Inc, to go vegetarian.  I’ve done it before and usually last a few months and then lose momentum.  I’ve been adding a lot of books about eating healthy and how my food choices affect our environment and I hoping this will allow me to continue eating healthy well into the future.  I have also started back up on the green smoothie diet in ernest.  I decided that the most healthy I’ve ever felt and the best shape I’ve been in was when I was doing this diet and exercising about 3 months ago.  It is time to get it in gear and get going again!  The amazing thing is how quickly my body responds to this lifestyle change.  I’ve lost 6 lbs in one week and I have more energy than I know what to do with at this point.  All I can say is that I’m extremeley happy to be back on this diet and making choices that I feel are better for me and for this world.

I have also started salsa dancing again and it is a tremendous gift in my life.  When I stop going I forget how much I miss the physical and mental aspect of salsa dancing.  I can dance for 4 hours straight and there is always something new and fun to experience with each dance.  I love seeing my friends, some of which I met almost 10 years ago now when I first started salsa dancing, and be part of a great circle that comes together every week to celebrate life, dance and happiness.

It is also my birthday on Friday, Feb. 19th and to celebrate I’ll be going to the San Francisco Salsa/Rueda Festival and dance for 4 days straight.  I feel like my dancing has found a level that I’m comfortable with and yet I strive to learn more.  I feel this festival will be a fanastic starting point and also a great way to meet a lot of people who are flying in from all around the world to attend and dance.  I hope if you are a salsa dancer you read this and choose to attend.  It is amazing!

To your health,

Aram

Also went for a 35 minute walk/run today. Ran a bit further than I did on Tuesday and felt much stronger doing it. I’m really suprised at how quickly my body is adapting and changing. I’m pretty sure I’ve dropped over 3 inches from my waist during the last 17 days. I’m looking forward to buying some new pants and belts in the next couple of weeks (want to wait until I find my correct weight) and seeing how I look in them.

After my run I decided to try my luck with kale chips.   Since I LOVE potato chips I wanted to see if this would be a healthy alternative.  I basically cut a bunch of kale up and put some olive oil and salt on them and put them in the oven at 350.  Well, since I have no sense of smell from my car crash I missed one important point: there is a lot of smoke when you cook these things on parchment paper.  So, my fire alarm went off and I jumped up to turn it off.  Luckily it wasn’t that big of a deal and the kale chips kept cooking.  After about 7 minutes I took them out and they tasted pretty darn incredible.  I’m going to have to figure out how to cook them without the smoke and if you have any suggestions, please let me know!  I’m also going to try them with soy sauce as that sounds pretty great!

To your health,

Aram

As I was on my ride I received a call from my work. I checked my voice-mail and the Vita-Mix had arrived and I could pick it up when I got back. I took my time riding home and enjoyed the view and everything else. I arrived home and then went to work and picked up the Vita-Mix box. I have to say, I thought it would be packaged in gold or something and not a simple box that said “Vita-Mix”. It is funny that my expectations of what it would come in were so different from reality and just proved to myself how big my expectations were for this product. As if the box would make a difference. Maybe it was like a Christmas present since I wanted it so much. The Buddha would not be impressed with my desire! LOL.

Anyway, I got home and started watching the video. I cleaned it and then made my first smoothie. First of all I have to say that I love that I can make 64 ounces of smoothie instead of just 32 ounces as with my old blender. I packed in 3 cups of flowering kale, 2 carrots, 2 bananas, 1 apple and 1 tablespoon of honey. Remember, this is all in one container! I’m still trying to figure out the flowering kale since it is very spicy so I probably need to add more honey next time and will adjust the recipe accordingly. Anyway, the Vita-Mix blended like a champ! It took about 45 seconds and it was done. There was no pulp or anything stringy. It was like drinking water or juice because it was absolutely emulsified. The taste was fantastic and I can’t wait to bring it to work with me tomorrow.

Later on, my buddy Saul came over and we started looking at the different recipes that come with the Vita-Mix. We were dumbfounded and amazed at how many recipes can be made by this product. We decided we wanted to try the strawberry ice cream. I’m still trying to stick to the green smoothie diet so ice cream is not allowed right now but after looking at the recipe which was 3 cups of frozen strawberries and 1 cup of nonfat yogurt, I decided it was okay. I set up the Vita-Mix again and made the ice cream in about 30 seconds. It was INCREDIBLE! It was as good as any ice cream I’ve had in restaurants and Saul agreed. I only had to have a tiny bowl of it because it was so delicious and filling. I bet that most restaurants use the Vita-Mix or something like it to do their own ice cream and now I can do it too!

Lastly, we decided we wanted to see what a basic orange juice would taste like. So we grabbed two oranges, peeled them but didn’t take out the seeds and added a 1/2 cup of water. I turned on the Vita-Mix and ran it for 20 seconds. It tasted like truly perfect fresh squeezed orange juice. I can’t believe what this machine can do and how great everything tastes so far!

When I first told Saul about it today he said, “400 bucks for blender!?!?!” and after this demonstration Saul said, “I think this is next on my list to buy. They should pay you a commission because you’ve turned so many people on to it!” I laughed and told Saul that I think that is how Vita-Mix has its products sold: someone tells or shows someone else and the product sells itself. Again, if not for Martine and my mom, I never would have thought of buying a Vita-Mix and I already can’t believe how I’ve gotten along without it!

By the way, weighed in again today and I’m down 13 pounds in 16 days. My belt no longer fits and I have to buy a new one. My pants are actually falling off my hips and legs if I don’t have a belt on and that hasn’t happened in years. I’m guessing I’m going to plateau soon and that is okay. As long as I keep eating healthy food and exercising the weight is not that important. I will be getting my cholesterol checked on Friday and can’t wait to see if it has dropped.

UPDATE: I just went to work and weighed myself. I am now down to 189. That is wearing clothes and shoes so I’m guessing I’m right around 185. I am thinking my ideal weight, at this point, is around 180 (with clothes on) and 175 or so naked. I can’t believe that I’ve lost 15 pounds in 17 days. I also can’t believe how much easier my bike rides and running has become on this diet.

To your health!
Aram

For snacks I just kept drinking my green smoothie through the day and had one apple and one orange.

For lunch I had some white rice (I’m going to buy a nice blend of brown and other rices as soon as possible for more nutrition), 5 ozs of tuna fish, lemon juice for taste and avocado for texture.  It was delicious and very easy to make!

For dinner I had some more green smoothie as I wasn’t really very hungry and just wanted to pay attention to what my body wanted.  I was talking to a friend on the phone who is interested in doing the green smoothie diet also but stated that she wasn’t sure she could give up “crunchy things” and I let her know that she doesn’t have to give it up.  What I do, when I want something crunchy, is to eat 2 or 3 potato chips.  I have some left over ones and when I eat them I stay totally attentive to the taste and texture and it gives me what I need.  Another friend has told you can make baked kale chips that are exactly like potato chips so I’m going to try and do that in the next week or so.  I think I had another banana at night to satisfy any cravings I had.

Speaking of cravings I have to comment on them.  I would have thought that I would totally crave solid food and crunchy yummy stuff.  Amazingly, within about 3 days, most the cravings went away.  It is like my body and mind figured out that I didn’t need all that extra stuff since I was getting such amazing nutrition in my smoothies.  I basically want to stick to the diet for at least a month and see where my body weight and cholesterol end up at.  I donate platelets at the local blood bank every couple of weeks and they do an automatic cholesterol test and I’m very interested to see how that turns out for me.

Lastly, I just checked on UPS and my new VITAMIX blender should be arriving today.  I will definitely blend some smoothies up in it tonight and tell you about the resulting product tomorrow.

To your health!

Aram

So, my basic day would go like this: I would start with a 32 oz smoothie and drink about 12 ozs of it to start off. My usual smoothie was pretty simple. It consisted of 2-3 cups of spinach, 2 bananas, 1 apple or orange and 2 teaspoons of honey. Martine had suggested not sticking to only one type of green so I changed daily from spinach to swiss chard to red chard to collard greens to flowering kale. I wanted to see if one or the other made a major difference in the flavor. Again, my tastebuds are a bit limited and I didn’t notice anything so I’m good to go. I would suggest not using lettuce since there is basically no nutritional value in lettuce at all. I would have a 5 oz can of tuna and possibly some rice if I felt like I needed some more substantive solid food but, surprisingly, I barely needed it. I made sure to get enough protein and couldn’t believe how fast the weight was burning off of me. I drank the green smoothie constantly and kept drinking loads of water and yet the weight kept falling off. I also added watermelon and other fruits to try them. They were all delicious!

Okay, now came the hard part. I was going on vacation to LA for a week and I was only one week into my challenge. I knew that I would have to really pay attention and make positive changes if I wanted to continue this lifestyle. I was staying with my friend Christopher and his family and they were very gracious about letting me hog their blender and fill up their veggie area in their fridge. Luckily, Tina, Chris’ wife, loves smoothies and was making them for her family too (she made normal smoothies not the green ones). This made it very easy because we just doubled the load of oranges, apples and fruits and I just bought loads of leafy greens. Eating out, which could have been the really tough part of the trip wasn’t. It was actually quite simple. I just asked for a nice salad, with the dressing on the side and some salmon or something grilled on top of it. My whole meal was under 1000 calories and the rest of the day I just drank my smoothies.

As my vacation progressed, I noticed that my shorts were starting to slip off my hips and that is something that hasn’t happened in years. I came back home with a new determination to start excercising and geting in shape. On Sunday morning I woke up at 7 am and went out for a 10 mile bike ride from my house to Marin and back over the Golden Gate Bridge (how lucky am I to live in San Francisco?) and then went salsa dancing at the Oakland Art and Soul Festival and over to Allegro Ballroom. A number of people told me that I looked much thinner and that I looked much healthier. I did a 30 minute walk-run today and enjoyed it immensely.

I have to admit, I was getting pretty excited and was looking forward to coming home and checking my weight. When I started my challenge, just 14 days ago, I weighed in at 204 lbs. I felt pretty upset with myself for allowing this to happen and really didn’t like that I had a gut at this point. Well, when I came back to work on monday, 14 days later, I weighed in and the scale showed 192 lbs. I had lost 12 pounds in just 14 days. It wasn’t water weight because that is all I’m putting in and I’m drinking more than I ever have before. All I can say is that I am very pleased with the results and the ease at which anyone could do this diet. It is not hard at all and it is better for you as a person and the world overall. The environment isn’t as affected and the smoothies only take about 1 minute to make so it is a fantastic time saver for busy people.

Anyway, the next step I wanted to take was to buy a Vitamix 5200 blender. These blenders can actually emulsify avocado pits in about 30 seconds. They are so powerful that they can make smoothies in 15 seconds and can actually make HOT soup because the blades spin so quickly (about 240 miles per hour!). I was talking to my mom, who owns one, and asked her about it. Sadly, the price is unreachable for me at this point (about $400). My mom told me how amazing her one was and then offered to help me buy one. My step-father also chipped in and so did my dad. I’m going to be ordering it tonight and hopefully it will be here within the week. I cannot wait to see what kind of delicious smoothies it can make and other things (like ice cream, nut butters, and salad dressings). I have a feeling that will be my next blog update. I’ve included a couple of links so that if my story has intrigued any of you and you want to check it out, just click on them!

This is the original video that Martine sent me with Victor Boutenko:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xW5LUkeVA6s

Here is another with his mother, Victoria who seems to have started this revolution:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUlJZD-RzEM

this is a link with a 2 week smoothie challenge. They will send you recipes and encouragement each day:
http://www.greensmoothiechallenge.com/

This is the blender I’m getting and what it can do:
http://www.vitamix.com/

I am often asked by people about how to be happy in their job, their relationships and their life. My belief system is partially Buddhist but more so about mindfulness in general.  I have often looked for jobs, friendships and relationships that would be “the one.”  However, the more I look, the more I find that no matter how much I believe one job is better than another, one person is better than another or that “it” will allow me to be happy, it, and I am fallible.  We have every chance to be exactly who we are and what we are right now.  We are that job we don’t like, which someone else would love to have.  We are that person we hate, we are all those things that we despise.  We are all just atoms that dispearse back to some other point when we are finished with them.    We can play many roles and, I would suggest, life necessitates it.

I often talk to people who see their choices as a linear “spectrum” and see it as a flat line that goes in one direction.  There is black on one end and there is white on the other (or whatever).  I ask them to take the ends of it and bend it into a circle so they see that the opposites are very close together and can almost be interchanged.  I’m not saying that Bush and Obama are that close, but they are probably not that different when you look at it:  both human, both “male”, both work in politics, both think they are doing the right thing, both believe they are chosen to lead, etc.

Be willing to feel the fear in new adventures, to make mistakes, and to revel in the changes that result.

It is my responsibility to take the positive in me and let it flow into what I do.  If I don’t, I then encourage negative energy from other’s to build and take control of my life.  Look at  the Dalai Lama; he is constantly smiling.  I am consciously putting out that I want to smile and love life more.  I am open to experiencing all that may bring!

Written on Flight 1407: returning to Oakland from NYC. 12/8/02

There are two ways to enter a new world: Either to be terrified or to decide to be eaten whole and to become enlivened by it. To be moved and changed and to see and feel things that one would never have guessed or even imagined. To be thrown, hurled, tossed, turned inside out and yet never feel that it is not pleasant.

This is the transformation that began in New York for me. To think that a boy who had always thought that he would have to return to the country to find safety and community and instead realizing that I had found in a city of 8 million strangers, all of whom are my brothers and sisters, as well as my cousins, my mother, my father, my grandmother, and my grandfather.

This is what I’ve found to be me:

Upon arriving I was filled with a slight apprehension. “New Yorkers are rude and in a hurry.” I could not have found this to be further from the truth. Strangers immediately helped me find my way and were gracious about it even though it was a Friday night and they were obviously on their way to something important in their own life. The open smiles, the many languages, the unlimited races and cultures all living in one place. It was both perfect and peaceful. It is hard to explain gracefully what New York means to me. Suffice it to say that I cried almost everyday because of the beauty, the love and the unbeatable spirit of the people who had been through such horrid times.

I have traveled to many places and have never felt the love that I felt in New York except one place: Hiroshima, Japan. It is my belief that the people of these two cities experienced the worst humanity can do and decided that love and kindness can stop it from happening again.

In New York, I saw the play “Our Town.” It is about a town much like Healdsburg, my hometown. The play is about a small place where nothing happens except life and how each second of it is important: birth, marriage, death. Everything passes quickly and if you don’t make the most out of each second, you miss life. Three seats from me Christopher Reeves sat in his wheelchair. I could not imagine what he must have been thinking after being on top of the world and then having that taken away. However, he, like New York and Hiroshima and hopefully each one of us, sees at that moment, that, no matter how simple and basic what we are doing right now is, it is of the utmost importance. My eyes well with tears as I tell you this and hope you understand what you all mean to me.

Love,

Aram